Posted in Tough Choices

To thine ownself be true


I have recently found that it is easy to fool ourselves when things are what we wish them to be. We can only get away with that for so long because the truth starts flooding through.  That is when you realize that you need to face the truth about life and people.  People are unreasonable and they can hurt you. Sometimes, they can completely shock you with their bitterness and anger.  All you can do is be the better person even when you feel like you are pulled from your center of balance.

I have to trust in myself in order to overcome the challenges that I am about to face.  At first, I thought that things would just work out and that people could be as reasonable and as rational as I am, but I am the one up at 4 am trying understand what I need to do. There is so much I need to do and I also have more faith in myself and in God before even begin to move forward. To thine ownself be true…

”This above all: to thine ownself be true,

 And it must follow, as the night the day,

 Thou canst not then be false to any man.”


Unless we are true to ourselves first, we cannot be true to anyone else.  I know that I have struggled with being true to myself and in that process, I have lost who I am.  It took someone else to tell me that I did not need others to define me because I was losing my ability to discover and grow inwardly.  I have accepted lies for so long that I have forgotten what it means to be true to myself.  The journey to self-discovery, my friends, is probably one of the most difficult journey we take in our lives. But without it, we cannot be set free from the unreasonable expectations that we allow others to impose upon us.

The word truth brings out the most negative emotions in us.  This because we know that truth and change go hand-in-hand.  Accepting the truth about ourselves is so difficult especially when we have been hurt so badly.  The fact is, the truth is the only thing that can set us free and allow to heal.  It is the only thing that can allow us the freedom to be ourselves, to come to terms with our weaknesses and appreciate what strengths we have.

Today, I don’t know what my self-truth is.  I just know that I need to find it to be stronger and to have healthy boundaries in my life.  Self-truth is also about love and because loving ourselves about living a life of truth.  There are people are there who are incapable of loving themselves or even others.  What it comes down to is that if we truly love ourselves, we are so much more open to loving others.

I have been told that if we have been honest with ourselves, truly honest, we can love ourselves despite our imperfections.  I have struggled with this for 101 reasons but I am making progress because I have finally decided that I can be happy without the approval of others. I just need to actually do something about that so I can find freedom and so that I can feel free to be imperfect.


6 thoughts on “To thine ownself be true

  1. 4:32am. I woke for the same general reason. And saw your email. I have a huge decision to make. I don’t know what to do.
    Thank you for your thoughts. Perfect timing.

  2. Amen. That’s the bottom line – to thine ownself be true. It is the only way to find happiness, peace and love of self. It dang sure isn’t always easy. YOU are the one to define yourself. Letting others do that is only setting yourself up for unhappiness.

  3. Wow, just got round to reading this and it couldn’t be more apt for a situation I am facing. I have been trying hard to be the old me for the sake of a friendship, but after a blow up this weekend, not with the friend, but with the friend’s husband who is very opinionated and only his opinion counts, I am finding that this is not the way I want to live and I am surprisingly OK with the fact that this may in the long term affect my friendship, but I want to be happy or sad on my terms and not someone else’s. Again, thank you for your insightful writings which never fail to inspire me.

    1. You are welcome and thank you for your kind words. Sometimes, all you can do is be honest with yourself and not worry so much about the opinions of others. As for friendship, your friend has to be willing to be your friend even if her husband disapproves. Otherwise, that friendship may not be worth keeping or she may need to rethink her own situation.

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