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How Do You Do It All? Thirteen Things About Me That Make That Not True

I got this email from a follower of this blog and I thought I would share it with all you.  It actually made me feel  like a real superwoman so it was really appreciated.

Wow Lana. I can’t believe all the things you do. You are a mother with a busy career, you do advocacy work, live with two chronic conditions and you manage to keep it all together.  How do you do it? I would love to know your secret!

While I appreciate that many people view me as this calm, cool, and an all together superwoman type who can juggle the world on her shoulders, seeing someone else say it felt kind of overwhelming.  I didn’t realize that is how people see me so I asked a couple friends and even co-worker and they agreed that they saw me as such.   I thought it would make sense to clear the air and any misconceptions that I seem to present here.

While you may see me as this supermom type,

This is really who I am.

What’s more:

  1. I am unorganized, emotionally challenged and incapable of ever getting my point across. Sometimes, no matter how loud I scream (BTW, I am a screamer) at my husband and kids, they can’t hear me.
  2. I cry at a drop of a hat and sometimes, I don’t know whether to laugh or cry and that can drive my family crazy.
  3. I hold grudges longer than I should even when I know forgiveness might be less stressful for me.  See number 1.
  4. My home is clean but don’t you dare open my closets and actually, I worry about you opening my closets.  See number 1.
  5. I am working on a master’s degree and maintaining a 4.0 not because I am smart but because I am deathly afraid of failure.  The reason I went into the legal field is because I knew I would be successful there. I can barely balance my checkbook and my husband is always yelling at me about overdraft fees. I scheduled my driving test four times before I finally had the courage to take it.
  6. I am a control freak and I am obsessive about getting things done right away and not putting them off which absolutely drives my husband crazy.  I am impatient and I don’t always know how to delegate.  See number 1.
  7. I am so tough that I can be emotionless.  See numbers 1 to 3.
  8. I am type A person who is driven and sometimes, I put more pressure on people in my life than I should and I don’t always know when to back off which gets me in a whole lot of trouble.
  9. I am crappy driver but if you tell me that while you are sitting in the passenger seat, be prepared to walk.  Just ask my sister.
  10. I love my kids so much that I worry about the craziest things and sometimes, it keeps me from letting my kids be kids.  Just ask my ten year old.
  11. My husband banned me from watching the news because well, see number 2.
  12. I hate shopping.  Because of that, either I shop online or do my research before going into the store.  To me, going shopping is like taking a hike so I have to plan accordingly.
  13. I am a planner and I plan for things weeks in advance and don’t you dare ruin the plan.  Just ask my husband.

Now, that I have cleared the air, the reason I appear to be able to do it all is because of all the things mentioned above.   In other words, I am pretty good at faking it.

If you look at look at numbers 12 and 13, you notice that I do a lot planning and shopping online.  In fact, one of my favorite websites is CSN stores.  These guys have over 200 online stores and literally billions of products.  If you are searching for briefcases, barstools, coffee tables, holiday décor, toys,  or anything you can think of, you have to check these guys out!  With the holidays approaching, and the fact that I hate shopping and that I have to plan every aspect of my life, I need a website like CSN stores to appear calm and collected.

Just so everyone knows, I responded to the person who sent this email and told her about this post.  She thought it was funny that I didn’t see myself as everyone else did. Did you really think that I was as she described?  How about now?


12 thoughts on “How Do You Do It All? Thirteen Things About Me That Make That Not True

  1. I think, I sort of see you as a mixture….. You are intelligent and quite capable, but you put too much on yourself. Perfectionist in the same ways my hubs is, and possibly unwilling to let others do things in a way that differs from yours?

    Of course we only see what you have allowed us to and there is so much more of you that we aren’t privy to, so rather hard to make assumptions. I didnt see you as a screamer though. 😀

    1. Get your mind out of the gutter Dee. Of course, I am a screamer because no one listens and my voice is so shrilly it embarrasses my son and my husband. No wonder it is always hoarse. Hey, what’s wrong with being a perfectionist – sorry that is the Capricorn in me. That explains why I cannot delegate.

  2. Lana, I know you feel and believe that you’re “faking it,” but I beg to differ. Seems to me that you do a bang-up job of getting through each day –and doing that well! — even though you’re less perfect than you’d like to be. I read through your list of reasons you’re not so great and thought, “maybe so, but you’re still doing a lot better than many people would, faced with the same daily obstacles.”

    Chronic pain, fatigue and fogginess is a huge drag on well-being. You’re doing everything you can to mitigate those things — taking the meds, trying to get enough sleep, doing your best to give yourself time to rest. Naturally, you can’t do it all, but you still manage to do most of it.

    I’d love to see you write about how WELL you do things, rather than how you don’t. It really is a mindset, and I believe it will give you strength and more joy in your life if you can do it.

    Sorry I haven’t commented for a while–I FORGOT that you’d moved to WordPress. I thought maybe you were taking a break from blogging for a while. Glad you aren’t–you always teach me and make me smile with your posts.

    Take care. Sending warmth, comfort and hugs in your direction.

    1. Wren, thank you. You are so sweet. I know the fact I am obsessive about things is this Type A personality and I think that people think I have it all together when I am often an absolute mess. The people closest to me know that pretty well. I just don’t want anyone to think that I am perfect, but I try really hard to make it look that way ;-). Maybe, one of these days I will write about how WELL I can do things – just wait and see. I missed your comments but I also know you have been having a tough a few days there. Take care.

  3. A very honest 13 I must say.
    If you see yourself as Rosanne then I know you are also loyal, sentimental & able to cook dinner while settling three fights at once.
    Sending good vibes your way.

  4. Wow…to be honest, I’m not sure how everyone else sees me…I’m almost afraid to ask!
    I think you’re a little hard on yourself here. Next time, why not do a list on things you like about yourself? 🙂
    You have a great-looking blog! Thanks so much for visiting and commenting on mine. 🙂

  5. I laughed when I read #9, I doubt your sister did. My wife doesn’t like for me to watch the news either, but because I talk ( ok, sometimes I yell) back to the TV.

    1. I actually did kick her out and then I came back for here. It was about nine years ago. She has never dared to repeat it. As for the news, I don’t blame your wife.

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